Anal sex is the act of stimulation of the anus in various ways like fingering, rimming, orally and anal intercourse which is the insertion of the penis in the anus similar to vaginal intercourse. While the stigma around anal sex is extremely high, in India and other parts of the world, people have started accepting it as an enjoyable and pleasurable addition to their bedroom. Unlike vaginal sex, anal sex is often not considered normal or natural since the anus is not an entry point but an exit route for the human body.

The idea of anal sex has polarized viewpoints, those who love it can’t go without it and some to whom even the thought is repulsive. However, those who have had an inclination for it and worked their way through it have made the internet wiser with tips and must dos to keep in mind before venturing on this journey.

The anus has a lot of nerve endings which can heighten orgasms for the woman. It is rare that orgasms are achieved purely through anal sex, but it could be a delightful experience nonetheless.

Anal sex isn’t something you do because all the cool kids are doing it. It’s not something you say yes to because your partner may be really into it, it’s okay to say no. Ladies, if your partner is being pushy about it, tell him there is no entry for assholes in the asshole. It’s a big decision to include anal sex into the bedroom routine. It is also okay to want it and have certain doubts, discuss them with your partner without holding back because discomfort has no room in this process (there’s going to be some when you actually try it).

The first thing to do is know whether you’re open to anal sex if it turns you on and if you’d really like to explore with your partner or let it remain a fantasy. A lot of partners have notions given the function of the anus in humans, so it is a must that both are equally ready to try it. An open, calm and safe talk about how you both feel about it is a must. It is also highly recommended that anal sex is only tried with someone you trust deeply because the process will take time, patience and understanding.

Once you’ve actually decided to give it a try, you’re going to need a ton of lube, a month full of lube supply to be on the safer side. Since the anus doesn’t self-lubricate like the vagina, a lot of water based lube is going to be required. Don’t be a cheapskate when it comes to using it on this night, apply on the rim of the anus, all over on the penis and try slowly applying some on the walls inside the anus. The anal tissues are delicate and could tear up with the least amount of friction.

Ensure you indulge in a lot of foreplay to get the body ready for it. Some couples buy butt plugs to get the anus ready to open up for the penis. There are butt plugs that come in increasing sizes which can be used to train the anus. Try to slowly insert a finger and check how much your partner can take. Pain is bound to be a part of the deal but it’s better to pair that with pleasure instead of stinging discomfort. Just like vaginal sex hurts the first time, anal sex might hurt a little more, hence, doing it with someone you trust is important.

Communicating the entire time is very important. It is vital that you do not rush into it, literally. Go slow, baby steps slowly because that is the only way to make sure both of you get to enjoy it. If you’re the receiver, don’t be afraid or worried to tell your partner when it hurts, feels uncomfortable and especially if you want to stop. The provider must at all times be open and listen to their partner and again, go slow.

A few other things to remember are that even though one couldn’t get pregnant the anal route you must always use a condom for anal intercourse, keep wet tissues ready on the side table, never insert the fingers and penis in the vagina after anal – it’s like an open party invitation to infections, always make sure your clean well with soap and water after the act, the receiver must make sure their bowel movements have been clean – anal tends to make you feel like you need to use the loo so if you’ve been constipated, do NOT try anal that day!

Pooja Pari

My name’s Pooja Pari. I’m a librarian who lives in the suburbs of Mumbai, a book work and a lazy cat, I fill my spare time by writing about NSFW content for and I love what I write, do share your opinions about my work in comments below.

February 26, 2017

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