You are too pretty to be Gay, How can you have a Boyfriend? Can't you be normal? How do you know you are Gay? Have you tried sex with both the genders? Our Gay Friends, Colleagues, members of the society have heard these or similar questions at least once. There is a lot of hue and cry in the public forum regarding equality, freedom of expression and liberty for the LGBT community. But what good it does if we ourselves are not very accommodating? It's time we straighten up these Myths, Questions, Stereotypes and be more accepting towards them. After all Love is Love. Here is our informative educational guide to help you break the stereotypes.
Being gay is not just physical attraction but a way of life. It encompasses the same needs of all people have, to love another person and be loved in return. Regardless of sexual orientation, we all have a common basic emotional need. In the light of the world, gay are spoken as if their existence is only limited to their sexuality. Being gay is only part of their being, and how they identify themselves. History has given us a lot of great writers, poets, actors, musicians that were Gay. In this series we attempt to break the stereotypes that people frame about gay.
It is a human nature to want to label things so that we can make sense of the world and putting all gay people in a box and assuming that they behave in a certain way is the easy way to deal with the unknown. Gay people, just like straight people are as normal as it can be. Try to be open minded and see the broader picture. Sexuality shouldn’t be a way of assuming how someone behaves.
We are raised to think that relationships only exist in male-female role terms, and hence people believe that these roles are emulated in same-sex relationship as well. So a lot of them would assume there is a female (passive, penetrated) and male (dominant, penetrator) role in the bedroom of a same-sex male relationship, or that one woman in a lesbian relationship is manly while the other is feminine. ⠀
These old school thoughts need to change, in modern times even the traditional ideas about heterosexual couples have changed: we now have stay-at-home fathers, career women, etc. The World now is much more diverse and people create relationships that suit them. ⠀
Some people view same-sex relationship as inferior, some view it as a weird sexual fetish rather than someone’s sexuality and believe that real romantic love can only be found with someone of opposite sex. ⠀
Gay people fall in love just like straight people do, and can also stay happy in lasting monogamous relationship like heterosexual couples. Love is a powerful feeling that brings people close, same-sex relationships are likely to succeed or fail just like opposite-sex relationships. ⠀
Anal (or penetrative) sex is just one of the sexual activities that a male same sex-couple may engage in, but it is not limited to gay couples. In our experience we have interacted with lot of (straight) couples in which men engage in anal stimulation with strap-on or butt plug with his women. Individuals decide what they enjoy or feel comfortable doing. It is about personal taste
A lot of people who come out to confront about their sexuality to their family are often told this. The answer to the situation would be to ask back how they can be sure that they are heterosexual if they haven’t tried same-sex experience. Sexuality is a choice that is deep-rooted in our self that dictates who we are attracted to, some learn about it late in their life while some might learn about it in their teens or before their first kiss. Putting oneself in a sexual situation to define his/her sexuality isn’t right and also it is unfair to the opposite sex partner. One should engage in sex with someone only when someone truly wants to. ⠀
Stereotypes are a way of classifying people we don’t understand. Just like myths, they are rarely accurate often puts the other in negative light. We are all people we shouldn’t assume who someone is because of the way they choose to express themselves or preferences. We need to understand and need to learn to accept one another for our differences and similarities. Asking questions is fine, framing someone in a particular or a bad way is wrong.